Apple Watch Series 10 [GPS + Cellular 42 mm] Smartwatch with Gold Titanium Case with Gold Milanese Loop. Fitness Tracker, ECG App, Always-On Retina Display, Carbon Neutral

I'm just thrilled to be reviewing my new Apple Watch, a mere $10,000 drop in the bucket for someone of my refined taste and utterly unnecessary wealth.I mean, who needs to feed a small village for a year when you can have a watch that tracks your every move and reminds you to breathe? It's not like there are more pressing issues in the world, like poverty, inequality, or climate change. Nope, let's just focus on making sure my watch is synced with my private jet's GPS.The design is sleek and stylish, perfect for flashing at my fellow one-percenters at the next charity gala. I mean, who needs actual charity when you can just wear a fancy watch and pretend to care?And the features? Oh boy, they're just the cherry on top of this overpriced sundae. I can track my workouts, monitor my sleep, and even receive notifications from my personal assistant (who, might I add, is paid a fraction of what this watch costs).All in all, I'd give this watch 5 stars, not because it's actually worth the price, but because it's a great way to signal to the world that I'm a soulless, entitled rich kid who has no concept of the value of money.

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